Marx, Darwin, And Queen Vic Walk Into A Video Game?

Question: what do you imagine Alexander Graham Bell, Charles Darwin, Karl Marx, Florence Nightingale, Charles Dickens, and Queen Victoria herself would do in the kooky Dan Brown historyfucking world of Assassin?s Creed: Syndicate [official site]? I ask because I laughed when I saw they?re all your pals in the next AssCreed, but I can now leak a few details about their roles. Four words: Charles Darwin?s spider mutagen.

Watch this daft new trailer closely and I?m sure you?ll figure out a few more secrets:

Right, here?s what my source Ian Video Games told me. Bell is obviously your gadget guy. Though his invention of the telephone was sparked by his interest in speech and sound, he also invented the grappling hook gun and electrobombs. When he joins you in combat, expect lots of awful deathpuns like ?Looks like you?ve been CUT OFF!?

Charles Darwin?s your other science bod. While Bell upgrades your tech, Darwin upgrades your body. His mutagens will splice Evie and Jacob with powerful abilities from animals such as spiders (+10% climbing speed), jellied eels (+10% dodge chance), and Cockney sparrows (a handsome beak letting you chirp to summon swarms of birds and regain health by pecking up seeds).

Karl Marx is the focus of a key quest line. Templar agents have swiped his original manuscript of Das Kapital, which ? oh no! ? contains hidden messages from the aliens. Does AssCreed still do aliens? Point is: across a dozen quests you will retrieve the manuscript and cipher and unlock powerful proletariat abilities ? if you have the coin. At the quest?s end, Marx quips ?Last words are for fools who haven?t said enough? before popping an electrobullet through the face of a Templar spy ? his own wife.

Amazingly, Florence Nightingale is written by someone whose research into her took the form of a YouTube search which ended at that sweary Big Train sketch. Her appearances are all too brief, and she?s gone after you win her lamp (+10 night vision) beating her in a race across the rooftops of Lambeth Walk. ?Jerrybag,? she spits.

?I?d be happy if you could stab Charles Dickens in the neck,? Pip told me. She will be happy. He is a Templar spy, but you?ll be right narked after you kill him and lose the powerful abilities he gave you. These include Let?s Twist Again (an AoE melee attack) and David Copperfield (disappear in a puff of smoke and walk through a wall).

As for Queen Victoria, well, I shan?t spoil it for you, but here?s a hint for how to earn Syndicate?s most difficult secret achievement: what will make her amused?

Please do share any details you?ve spotted in the trailer, chums. Or wait until it comes out on October 23rd and see how real all these real facts are, I guess.

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